Wednesday, 19 May 2010

Growing In God

I am not perfect! I'm fully aware of my shortcomings and weaknesses.However, I am a strong woman. I may crumble under pressure but I don't lie low for too long.Nah!not this sister!
My life is a journey and I have encountered a lot of bumps on the way(some caused by bad choices)but hey! I'm still here. I have overcome challenges that might crumble other people but they've only left me with scars.I don't hide my scars,I flaunt them. They are reminders of battles lost and won.Trophies to display and regale along the way. Its no wonder I stopped wearing my prosthesis(I had an accident in 2003 that led to the loss of 3 fingers on my right hand).
I don't view myself as disabled but physically challenged. The prosthesis disable me-i always felt i was hiding something bad.
My rebellion from the bondage of the prosthesis is a reflection of my flip side. It is an open message to the world that I'm a strong woman but also vulnerable.My appearance and my voice is strong but I'm also soft.Moreover, my 7 fingers and apparent "disability" is the sound of amazing grace. God in in His infinite mercy delivered me from the clutches of death that I might declare His glory among the living!!! hallelujah!!!!! I'm planning on doing a photo shoot titled "I AM BEAUTIFUL". Its a beauty and the beast kinda thing(need to lose more weight lol).
I have also not lost my ability to laugh or my penchant for humour.Laughter is the breadline of life. A life devoid of laughter is worthless(read my earlier post "Too Posh To Laugh".
The last five years have been huge.I have learnt to cry(a lot) but also matured. Things that seemed important and to die for no longer faze me(e.g sex!To the glory of God I've abstained for 5 years).I am also content but still learning to wait on God.
In all, when caught in the storm or tossed by the waves of difficult situations, i raise my head and swim against the tide. I refuse to be submerged.
My experiences are my testimony. They are reminders of God's faithfulness and ability to deliver.So, i am not ashamed! I am proud of myself! my ability to cry and make mistakes shows my humanity but the grace to overcome shows God's divinty.

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